A Math Problem
Me: It’s Groundhog’s Day and he predicted 6 more weeks of Winter.
10 year old: Awww … that means it’s going to be longer until my birthday.
Me: ??? I think we need to spend more time on Math.
Is it Laundry Day
14 year old
Kid: Did you already do laundry?
Me: Yes! I got it done early today.
Kid: But … I thought you were going to do it today.
Me:???
Me: It is today.
Kid: Oh yeah. Right.
All Play and No Work
7 year old kid: I want an iPod.
Me: But you always tell me to turn the music down when I’m listening to it.
Kid: That’s because I’m busy playing.
Facebook Will Make You Popular
Out of nowhere my 8 year old started lecturing me about how I could be more popular – I’ve never said anything about being dissatisfied with my social life. She recommended that I post on Facebook more.
Parents Can Be Funny Too
Kid: Why is that man running down the street in pajamas?
Me: Those are his jogging jammies.
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Kids Are Turds
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